Self Improvement

How To Be Successful In Your Pursuit Of Happiness

Freedom CourageYou’re sitting in your cubicle on a beautiful hot summer day thinking about the great time you’re going to have after work.

But about four thirty your boss suddenly is standing there, blocking the entrance of your cubicle demanding that you stay and put a couple of hours of overtime.

Suddenly a rush of anger just boils up from the core of your soul and you feel like sending your boss to hell…

But you don’t… you restrain and just sheepishly say: “Ok, I’ll stay!”

In a situation like this, you certainly wish you could be strong and courageous to be able to use your God given right of freedom of choice and do what you really want, which is to quit and get the hell out of there…

But you don’t!

You know that given the circumstances, you can’t take that type of apparently irrational action. However, in your head a burning desire starts to build up… you deeply want to find the secret to financial success, authentic happiness and freedom.

How to use your freedom of choice in your pursuit of happiness and financial freedom?

Even though in a lot of circumstances it doesn’t look like it, FREEDOM OF CHOICE is a God given or innate right that each one of us has.

The problem is that in a lot of situations and because of circumstances beyond our control, we might feel that the pursuit of happiness and financial freedom is in our case way out of reach and unattainable.

But is that actually so? I sincerely don’t think so…

I believe that your physical situation has no bearing on your ability to achieve authentic happiness and financial freedom.

It might not be easy, but it’s attainable if you subscribe to a definition of happiness that empowers you and helps you develop the courage to change and get ahead in life.

Let’s talk about happiness for a second

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Happiness is one of the biggest dreams or goals people have. In fact, people pursue it constantly. That’s why you hear it over and over that people just want to be happy!

They actually try all kinds of things to achieve that goal. The routes people take to try to attain this goal vary completely and what happens, is that lot of people think happiness is something they need to get to, something tangible they will be able to keep once they’ve reached it.

However, according to the majority of researchers and philosophers, happiness is related to the distinctions people have inside their heads about what will grant them that most desired wish of happiness.

Some will read lots of quotations on happiness thinking that, somehow, doing that will help motivate them to be happy. Others will subscribe to the belief that money doesn’t buy happiness, and therefore concentrate themselves in the search of nirvana or some special illuminated state.

When people embark on this quest without understanding the importance of what happens inside their heads, they’re falling prey the happiness trap, which results in them being more frustrated, unhappy and stressed at the end of their pursuit than what they were at the beginning.

The problem is that the misconceptions people have about what happiness itself actually is, throw them curve balls that derail them from their goal of achieving authentic happiness and financial freedom. And each person seems to have a completely different definition of what happiness is or, even better said, what would be required to make them feel happy.

But once you dig deep enough, you’ll discover that happiness is just a STATE OF MIND. And a state of mind is relatively easy to obtain, once you know how to do it.

But before we go into it, let’s dispel a common misconception…

Does money buy happiness?

In my mind, this is one of the biggest misconceptions that people have concerning happiness.

They either honestly believe that money cannot buy happiness and is actually the source of all evil and that, therefore, if they have money they can’t be happy at all or, on the opposite side of the spectrum, they subscribe to the school of thought that believes that they can’t be happy if they don’t have lots of money.

However, if you read my statement above in the previous section, where I said that happiness is a state of mind, something will somehow be kind of illogical with this money thing.

Ask yourself, what does money have to do with a state of mind? In reality, nothing!

A state of mind, as the words clearly say it, happens inside your head, in your mind. Money is just a physical representation of a very practical means for the exchange of goods and services.

Yes, I will 100% agree that having lots of money will allow you to arrive at your problems with style, but having money does not guarantee real love and authentic happiness.

In fact, when you look at the lives of wealthy people in public life, you’ll see a huge percentages of unhappiness, lack of mental freedom, betrayal and a bunch of things that are not conducive to happiness at all.

Why is this so?

Because these people have never learned to deal with their mental states and control them.

As we can see, money and happiness can go hand in hand, but only when the right mindset has been cultivated and nurtured independently of wealth and circumstances.

Freedom of Choice

As I mentioned in the introduction to this post, when we live in democratic countries, certain freedoms have been guaranteed by constitutional rights.

Freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom of press and the ability to pursue financial freedom, are things that lots of countries guarantee.

And yet, in a lot of cases, you’ll find those freedoms lacking in the lives of many people.

Let’s not talk about the general circumstances of nations here, but let’s concentrate in what we as individuals can do in this respect.

Start with the right mindset

Given that happiness is a state of mind, it’s not something that can be obtained just by liking a bunch of “Pursuit of Happiness Quotes” in Facebook or Pinterest.

It does require having the courage to change your mindset. To do this, you need to first understand where you are in terms of mindset and attitude.

You must learn to accept that the freedom of choice does not mean that you can change everything in your life. There are certain things that you will have to learn to accept as they are and interpret their meaning in a completely different way… a way that’s positive and ends up benefiting you.

However, it’s not just acceptance. And this is of paramount importance; it also requires action. Action to change the things that you CAN change but have taken for granted for a long time.

You might be terrified of changing deeply entrenched behaviors and beliefs in your life. But have courage!

Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to be terrified and still go ahead and do what we know we need to do.

Once you start acting the right way, once you have projects that fulfill you, that give you a purpose, once you start having a growth mindset, you will be in the “happiness mindset” on a regular basis.

You will not have to pursue happiness. You will just be happy the majority of the time.

Yes, you’ll enjoy quotations on happiness and freedom. But their impact will not just be a nice collection of words, but the fact that your own life will be a reflection of what most of those quotes say.

Hermann Bock


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Take a look at yourself
Blog, Self Improvement

The Ultimate Life Hack: Stop Whining About Everything!

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I don’t know about you, but I seem to have a magnet for them, they just seem to pop up all around me and they really get on my nerves.

Yes, I’m talking about complainers!

Those people who seem to have only one purpose in life, namely, whine about everything constantly.

So, am I turning into one of them right here? Erm… Nope!

This post is not a rant, it’s an observation and a way of making you think about it and together with me, discover that there is a better way. One that can take you to a different and better way of life.

See, when you are a whiner, you have a very specific focus in life. And that focus determines many things about how you experience life. This is so, because your focus determines your perception of life. It will determine which experiences you will zoom in and which ones you’ll actually delete from your experience.

Watch the video above, to see the excellent and amazing example of Nelson Mandela, who after spending 27 years in prison, was determined to NOT BE A COMPLAINER.

Can you learn something from his experience? You bet! In fact, we all can…

The only way to really get forward in life is by changing your interpretation of things and to do that, you need, no, you must change your focus. You must start focusing on the positive and thinking about how to improve and solve problems instead of just whining about them. Do you get my drift?

I hope you do!

If you want to know more about how you can completely change your attitude and focus in life, check out the video below and then click on the button.

Hermann Bock

 

 

 

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Blog, Self Improvement

Don’t just try; DO!

How to get rid of the inability to ACT!

Don't TRY; DO!We all have been confronted with a situation where we intellectually knew what was best for us and yet, it was very hard to actually do what was required of us to properly benefit from it.

The reason things like this happen to us, is due to the fact that, very seldom, we do stuff because our intellect consciously tells us to do it. The truth is, that there are many things that determine how we act and why we do what we do. It’s however a fact, that most of what we end up doing, is controlled by our subconscious.

Think about it, people do stuff because they are “used to doing it that way”, or because “it feels good”, or “it’s part of my temperament”, or “it’s a habit for me”, etc. If you examine these claims to a deeper level, you’ll discover that they are “ALL” controlled by that part of us that we tend to forget, but that rules our lives 24/7, namely, our subconscious mind.

This is why, whenever you say that you are going to try to do something, you will most likely not do it. Or, if you start, as soon as the going gets tough, you’ll stop. Probably telling yourself proudly, Hey, at least I tried!

One thing we forget most of the time though, is how fast our brain or mind acts. When you’re being presented with a course of action, your brain starts immediately evaluating how painful or pleasurable will it be to follow that course.

If the result of the evaluation is, VERY PAINFUL, you’ll most likely completely avoid doing it, at whatever cost. However, if the result is just painful, you might offer a: I’LL TRY!

The thing is though, that your subconscious mind already knows that it won’t like the process, that it will cause it discomfort and pain and it doesn’t want to commit. But your conscious mind, your intellect, which is aware of the possible social repercussions of not following that course of action, compromises. And forces you to say those awful words I’LL TRY TO DO IT!

Being aware of this will help you succeed

Now that you know what happens behind the scenes in your mind, when you’re confronted with an unpleasant task, you can take countermeasures.

It’s not going to be easy, given that we tend to go through life like robots. We have so many habits and routines or, like Tony Robbins calls them, RITUALS that have been installed by who knows who, that we just keep repeating in an automatic fashion.

That’s why we react the same way, most of the time. You come back from work and, most likely, do exactly the same everyday. Hang the keys, take your shoes off, head for the fridge to get something to drink and so on and on and on.

And that is also why, when we get to the point of interrupting a pattern in an abrupt manner, we have the possibility of installing a new one.

What I’m trying to achieve, is to make you stop and think about the things you do, and the reactions you exhibit to the different things that occur in your life. Deactivate the Autopilot and take the manual control of your reactions.

Don’t ever again say, I’ll try! Instead, say either I WILL! or I WON’T!

Remember, your mind already made an evaluation (though not necessarily a correct one) of the situation. So, if you don’t like it at all, say I won’t do it. It’s so simple!

But what if it’s something unpleasant and arduous that requires lots of time, money and effort, but is to your own benefit?

It’s time to use the powers of your mind to your own favor

We all have been in that situation. We want something but it’s hard to get and could even take years to achieve. Time during which we will have to spend money and put in lots of effort. What can we do?

Well, it depends!

Think about school. Most of us went through it for years. We had to, day in and day out, attend those boring classes and we were not even sure WHY we had to.

How come the majority of us finish at least basic school?

We had somebody pushing us and holding us accountable. Be it your parents or even the government. It’s something you just have to do in modern society.

But have you been able to achieve something as monumental as that, by yourself?

If you have, it’s because you tapped into the powers of both, your conscious and subconscious minds. They helped you become accountable and keep the goal in front of your eyes as real as possible, so you didn’t detour and kept going in the right direction. You made a commitment to DO IT, and you did it. But how did you manage?

Did you notice the things I mentioned above? They’re bold, just in case! 🙂

You committed, you held yourself accountable and you kept your goal in front of you as real as possible!

That’s the key to doing it and not just trying it.

The power of RITUALS

As I mentioned above, each one of us has habits or rituals that we do, even unconsciously. The problem is that most of those rituals were not installed by us with a specific result in mind. But, we definitely CAN do that!

Imagine creating routines that help you achieve your goals, by keeping them in front of you as much as possible. Are you going to write a blog post every single day?

Create a ritual that helps you achieve that!

Do you want to change your way of eating? Maybe reducing the amount of sugar and starches that you eat?

Engineer a ritual that will help you in not even buying the stuff in the first place!

These rituals are the results of CHOICES and DECISIONS that you make at some point. Then you take the time to develop a series of steps or behaviors that will help you get what you want. And then, you repeat those steps until they become automatic. You create a ritual!

So, what you gonna do?

The ball is now on your side of the pitch. It’s your decision if you’re going to do something with this or, if it’s just going to be like one of those thousands of memes going viral on the Internet on sites like Facebook, Google+, Twitter or Pinterest.

Try to take just one lesson from this and make the choice to implement it as fast as possible. By having a little success, you’ll feel motivated to keep it up. Make it a ritual to improve yourself a little bit each day.

Believe me, it’s worth it!

Hermann Bock

 

 

 

 

 

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Blog, Self Improvement

10 Tips To Be More Successful At Anything

Fear of failing while trying to succeedEach one of us has an innate desire to be successful. You only have to look at little kids and notice how fast they develop the desire to WIN and be more successful in anything they try. In fact, one of the biggest challenges as a parent is teaching kids how to deal with „losing“.

Why is that? Winning feels GOOOOD! Losing, not so much. Winning means you‘ve been successful in a competition of some sort and, because it gives you a feeling of accomplishment and pleasure, you love it!

But as we get older, we might let the noise of day to day life get in the way of our striving for success, our striving to win in the game of life. We forget how good it feels to win, to be successful and we accept, somehow, the notion that something called “Fear Of Success” actually exists.

To rekindle that fire and, not only that, but also to show that it’s worth the effort, here are 10 tips that will help you win or succeed more often in the game of life, independently of what succeeding means to you.

1. Become a Starter

To be able to achieve ANYTHING, you have to „start something“. It might sound simplistic and very logical, but it‘s unbelievable the amount of people who keep dreaming about a goal but NEVER DO ANYTHING to get themselves closer to making it a reality.

Only if you start, you‘ll have a chance at finishing. That first step is the MOST IMPORTANT thing you can do to become successful. I don‘t care how big or small, how easy or difficult your dreams are. If you don‘t start, NOTHING will happen in the REAL WORLD.

2. Set INTENTIONS not EXPECTATIONS

Expectations are a picture in your head about how something SHOULD be. The problem is, reality might deliver a surprise. If what reality delivers differs from the picture in your head, you might feel completely frustrated and disappointed.

So, by leading with expectations, you might be setting yourself up for those negative feelings.

Intentions, on the other hand, reveal a DIRECTION you wish to take to achieve something. Since it‘s ‚just‘ a direction, you have always the ability to CORRECT YOUR PATH if you discover, that you‘ve been somehow drifted from the main goal. It might take longer, but you know that if you continue going, you‘ll eventually get to your INTENDED destination.

3. Learn to deal with FAILURE

No matter what you want to achieve, you will fail and, likely, more than once. How do you react when this happens? Do you just give up and consider yourself a failure?

One little illustration should help you understand the PURPOSE OF FAILURE. Yes, it has a purpose you should never forget.

Think of babies and how they learn to walk. How many times do they fail when starting to walk? Do they give up?

Watch this video and try to determine what failure actually teaches us: 

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From this video it should be clear that FAILURE helps us be BETTER AT SUCCEEDING!

So, get excited if you fail, for you‘re getting better at understanding success.

4. Cast away the FEAR

Fear of succeeding, what is that? If you think logically, it makes NO SENSE. Why would anyone be afraid of succeeding, when succeeding feels soooo good?

To be honest, it‘s more likely you have FEAR OF FAILING AT TRYING TO SUCCEED, or you‘re afraid of change.

How to deal with fear then?

One way is understanding what fear really is. Let me use a very popular acronym to bring the point home:
F alse
E vidence
A ppearing
R eal

Do you get it? Fear is regularly something that happens IN YOUR HEAD caused by movies you play in your mind. These movies might not even be based on reality.

Therefore, examine the movies in your head and determine if they‘re in accordance with facts and reality.

Basically, be afraid but DO IT anyway!

5. Be a LIFELONG learner

I don‘t know how old are you. But I‘m pretty sure that if you‘ve read to this point, you‘ve witnessed big changes in the world during your lifetime. It might be the demise of the old cell phones in favor of the smartphones or, if we go back in time, you might remember when cell phones didn‘t even exist. Or MP3s, or the Internet.

The point is, this world is changing everyday and the speed of change is accelerating.That means that almost anything you learn today has a very short lifespan.

It will soon be obsolete and forgotten and new things will come along and replace them. Things we can‘t even imagine today.
It‘s therefore imperative that you are willing to CONSTANTLY be in a LEARNING MODE. Embrace new stuff, welcome change, be curious about your sorroundings and what it can teach you. Change is the only constant of the new world.

And whatever you learned or are learning in school, is probably obsolete by now. So, make up your mind and be ready to learn for the rest of your life.

6. Use the Power of Decisions

Remember tip number 1 about starting stuff? It can only be possible if you DECIDE to start. So, actually, before even starting you have to use your power to make decisions.

We make lots of decisions everyday, some small, some a bit bigger.

However, decisions about achieving our dreams tend to be a bit more, how could I say it, lost in the noise of day to day life. This is actually very sad, because only by having a purpose, which comes from doing something that we really want to do, is that we can be really happy. Which highlights the importance of making decisions about starting or continuing to pursue our dreams.

To know more about how to take decisions, take a look at my previous article about this subject. 

7. Don‘t live IN the PAST or the FUTURE

The PAST is gone! And even your memories of it might be distorted.

What‘s actually the past good for? To TEACH us lessons that can be used to live a better life IN THE PRESENT. Obviously, you should be VERY PICKY and only choose lessons that are to your advantage in your quest for success. You have the power to decide which lessons you‘ll take from your past.

What about the FUTURE? To be honest, the future is pure speculation. Nobody knows for real what‘s gonna happen in the next week, let alone in the next 5 years. And since ANY and EVERY decision you make today is a cause set in motion, your future is not set in stone, but…

.…you can create a DIRECTION and use it to make your future be more like what you wish. (See tip number 2 again for more on this)

Imagine the future you want and be as clear about it as possible, and then take actions IN THE PRESENT to increase the chances to make that intended future a reality.

8. Take advantage of SYSTEMS

Every successful person has systems in place that saves them time and effort. Systems allow a person to not waste time.

What are systems you ask? Anything that works in an almost automatic way for your benefit.

Utilizing HABITS for your advantage could be a way of implementing systems at the personal level. Once you‘ve implemented a habit, you don‘t have to think. And once it happens automatically, it becomes a system!

But there are systems at other levels. For instance, if you are a blogger ,having an AUTORESPONDER to collect emails and send automated messages to your list, is a way of having a system. It frees you to do other‚ more important‘ stuff, increasing your chances of success.

Take a look around you and try to discover better and more efficient ways of doing stuff. Habits and automation are two good examples of using systems for success.

9. Take care of YOURSELF

What benefit does it have if when you‘re finally successful you cannot enjoy your success because you‘re ill or have no energy?Becoming a success „normally“ takes time. Becoming a sufferer of what is called a „civilization‘s disease“ takes time as well.

So, how to improve your chances of being healthy by the time you achieve your success? By taking care of yourself. That means, exercising, eating healthy and having some kind of regime to keep your inner, spiritual, emotional self healthy too.

Gone are the days when success was measured by the size of your waist. Doing stuff to stay healthy is not just a fad that‘s ‚IN‘ now. It should be something you do for the rest of your days.

And it has the benefit that it helps you enjoy, not only the destination of success, but the journey as well. It gives you more energy, more zest for doing those things that might mold the future that you intend.

10. Be CONSISTENT and have PATIENCE

You‘ve heard it before: „Rome wasn‘t built in a day“, but I‘m sure everyday a bit was built until it became the magnificent city we all know about. Same thing with you. Your success requires consistency and patience.

Consistency to keep at it day after day, when it looks like nothing is being achieved. When it seems that you‘re wasting your time. And patience to be able to wait until that sweet success arrives. Because, when it does, you realize that it was all worth it because it feels GOOOD!

So there you go, 10 tips that will greatly improve your chances of success in whatever it is you want to achieve.

Do you have other tips that you‘ve applied that have also brought you closer to success? I’d love to know about them in the comments below.

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